388 E Ocean Blvd #1618, 90802
Price: $399,900
Beds: 2
Baths: 2
Sq. Ft.: 960
$/Sq. Ft.: $417
Year Built: 2004
MLS#: S587585
HOA: $494 (not nearly as bad as others we've seen--could that be a mistake?)
Down Payment: $80,000
Income Requirement: $114,000
Monthly Nut: $2,600
On Redfin: 1 day
Description: 2 BEDROOMS AND 2 FULL BATHS, LOCATED IN THE ULTIMATE CALIFORNIA LIFESTYLE OF LONG BEACH'S NEWEST HIGH RISE COMMUNITY,'AQUA' WITH A PANORAMIC OCEAN VIEW. OVERLOOKS THE CONVENTION CENTER. SPACIOUS BALCONIES, 8 FT HIGH WINDOWS, 10 FT CEILINGS, SOUND ABSORBING CONCRETE WALLS, HIGH SPEED INTERNET ACCESS AND ENERGY EFFICIENT APPLIANCES. ENJOY THE EXCEPTIONAL AMMENITIES YOU DESERVE, SAUNA MASSAGE ROOM, FITNESS CENTER, CLUB ROOM, CONCIERGE, SUNDECK, POOL. THIS IS A SHORT SALE SUBJECT TO LENDER APPROVAL. WE ARE VERY EXPERIENCED AND GET OUR SHORT SALES CLOSED!!! HURRY! THIS ONE WILL GO FAST!
"AMMENITIES"?
"LOCATED IN THE ULTIMATE CALIFORNIA LIFESTYLE OF LONG BEACH'S NEWEST HIGH RISE COMMUNITY,'AQUA' WITH A PANORAMIC OCEAN VIEW."
Huh? Was that translated from English to Japanese to Hebrew and back into English?
I'll cut you some slack because, well, it's a new listing and my expectations for realtors are incredibly low. But what's up with these photos? This is a decent place--why post such dark, unflattering shots?
Dude, is that a freaking Christmas tree in the bottom left corner?
And que la chinga with the bedroom? No amount of photography magic could un-awkward that janky layout:
As Redfin informs us (in their own hilarious way), this is a short sale:
"This home is flagged as a short sale. We're sorry, we don't tour or write offers on short sales because of the slim chance that you'll get the home."
And just how short is it? Oh, not too bad...
Aug 31, 2009 - Listed $399,900
Aug 10, 2007 - Sold $800,000
Sep 20, 2006 - Sold $650,000
HOLY SHIT!
$400 Grand?!
I somehow doubt that seller is going to come up with the scratch to save his credit.
Do you think the bank's loan supervisor has to wear adult diapers when he looks at his portfolio of approved loans? Hell, I'm getting irritable bowel just looking at that colossal loss. I bet they had to move his office to the ground floor to avoid any impromptu BASE jumping attempts.
$400,000 is a massive haircut. More like a scalping with a pair of rusty tweezers.
Do you see why a slight increase in sales is meaningless in terms of calling a bottom? No shit houses are finally selling--they're priced 50% lower than 24 months ago!
Even if $400,000 is a complete rip-off, it still looks like a smoking hot deal compared to the peak price of $800k! Especially for a recently built luxury condo with ocean views and balconies...if you really had to buy right now you could do a lot worse.
But if you fall for the "It's-half-off-a-certifiably-WTF-price-so-it-must-be-a-great-deal" meme and are considering plunking down $400,000--oh, sorry, $399,900--please pay no attention to the other, much larger short sale asking $25,000 less, or the (somewhat) recent sales of $300,000, 345,000, $350,000, and $380,000--all with more square footage.
And please don't reference the going price per square foot in 90802, because paying $417 per square foot might make you feel like you got taken:
Oh, and avoid the Internet like the plague because the AQUA site says you can rent a 1,057 square foot, two-bedroom apartment for $2,200 a month--a $400 monthly savings.
Finally, whatever you do, DO NOT visit Craigslist. Because there you'll find a 1,040 square foot 2/2 corner unit renting for $1,800 a month. That's $800 per month cheaper than owning, and paying that oppressive HOA every month is someone else's problem.
Whoops. Maybe $400,000 (assuming the bank gets around to approving that price) isn't such a good deal.
Personally, if I was interested in an Ocean Boulevard condo, I'd want to be beach-front and not parking lot-front. But that's just me.
What about the light fixture in the kitchen, Flourescent tubes, wtf. Looks real cheap...
ReplyDeleteGreat point, Anon. You'd think for $400,000 (let alone $800,000!) it would come with lighting slightly upgraded from the fixtures hanging over the ping pong table in your uncle Gil's garage.
ReplyDeleteI honestly don't know how Aqua is going to make it--they're so new and went in at such the wrong moment that they have no equity owners. I'd wager that every unit is upside down. The local competition--700 Ocean and 525 Seaside Way as examples--probably have enough equity owners to keep the place from sinking. But banks don't pay HOA dues (and I'd bet that most short-sellers probably don't either)--which is going to make maintaining all those luxury amenities pretty difficult.
ReplyDeleteAnon,
ReplyDeleteThat's a very good point. The equity owners are in the severe minority. I mean, the "value" on this one property just got cut in HALF in just two years--the equity owners must be shitting their sheets looking at this!
Plus, who is going to make up for all the (FC, REO, SS) delinquent HOA fees? Answer: The only people who have a vested interest in doing so--the few remaining equity owners. Assuming they can dodge the "underwater" bullet, they are still going to take it in the shorts.
I wonder what the ppsft projections were when they built it?
This right here, has got to be THE best blog article yet, El Bee.
ReplyDeleteI mean this is freaking amazing, on so many levels....
First you have the Aqua buildings themselves, which are supposed to be "luxury", but have you checked out how small the pool is??? (and I'm wondering if that one small pool is for all three buildings? No, that can't be.)
Now the location is great, but you're not paying HOA for location, so what are you really getting for that extra 5-6 hundred per month? (I'd venture to say, a HECK of a lot less, then you'd get at West Ocean Two, for just a hundred or so more.)
I had looked at listings in those buildings, for units that were as low as 200K, but then when you see the HOA fine, it's forget it. No way in hell am I paying an extra 500 and change per month, unless the facilities blow me away.
Then the point you and anon make about the equity owners, is just mind-blowing. Wow....
One small thing I wanted to add, was that the bedroom layout in this one seems like it might be interesting, but I can't tell... is there a patio between the living room and bedroom?
Either way, the view from the bedroom seems nice... but then again, you'd never be able to tell, from those photos.
And El Bee, you SO hit the nail on the head with these realtors. Aye carrumba! How do sellers go about picking these realtards out?!?!?!
What a mess.
Aqua is f*ed. The builders have given up and are renting units.
ReplyDeleteHOA of $494 is a bold lie. It's at least $600. I found in our condo hunt that most MLS listing understand HOA fees.
Aqua units look SO cheep inside and corodor-style hallways are apartment-esque. In fact, Aqua was slated to be apartments, and they switched the plans to condos in the early 2000s. I know all this becuase we looked at buy in Aqua in 2008 and THANK goodness we did not.
PS- Mike In the LBC's so right about the pool. It's tiny and always shaded by the building.