"It's baaaccckkk....I thought Groundhog's Day was two months ago?"
Ha! Groundhog Day!
"Ned? Ned Ryerson?!"
Thanks for sending this one in, Eddie. This property, which has been rotting on the market in different forms for an eternity, perfectly illustrates the greed, insanity, and reality-denial of many Long Beach sellers.
This self-styled Real Estate Investment Strategist (read: idiot flipper) put the absolute nicest materials into a 91-year-old house, in a so-so neighborhood with a median household income of $49,073, and is shocked--shocked!--that nobody has come along to provide him with his well-deserved bubble profits.
And it appears he still refuses to let go of the stunningly misguided belief that he will walk away from this with a wheelbarrow full of cash. Good luck with that!
Click here for my past posts: A FIESTA INTO A FERRARI
The property has once again been re-listed, and the parade of delusion continues. This time, however, we go from a WTF price of $825,000...to another WTF price of $700,000 (can we knock it off the used car salesman's "$699,900" crap already?) But I think this time it has a real shot! (lie)
By the way, how much of a shit-heel would you feel like if you bought a few months ago for $825,000? Or 10 months ago for $900,000? "I swear, this time this is really the true price. It'll never go any lower--this is it! For reals this time, y'all!"
Yep, this is the "true price" just like the "bottom was in" late last year. How'd that prediction work out?
Here is the updated information:
Address: 366 Orizaba Ave, 90814
Asking Price: $699,900 (from an original $899,800)
Year Built: 1918
Size: 2 beds, 2 baths, 1560 sq. ft.
$/Sq. Ft.: $449 (from $577)
Purchase price: $423,000
Purchase date: 7/2002
MLS#: P682147
On Redfin: 2 days
Down Payment: $140,000 (up from $89,900)
Monthly Payment: $4,200 (assuming 6.5% Jumbo--down from a staggering $6,000 per month)
Income Requirement: $200,000 (down from $225,000)
Description: Beautifully restored 1918 Craftsman Bungalow in the historic Bluff Heights neighborhood of Long Beach. Living and dining room combination with a working fireplace,skylight, and original hardwoods. Guest bath completely redone with marble and slate, a pedestal sink,custom lighting and glass shower divider. Guest bedroom is spacious. Master suite includes high end custom cabinetry,ceramic tile floors, indonesian rock walk-in shower and separate tub, and designer glass tile wall with vessel sink. Dream eat-in kitchen/great room with slate flooring, newer cabinets,granite counters and large center island and pantry. Sliders from the kitchen open up to a peaceful backyard deck overlooking the yard and koi pond. The house has been painted a soothing palate of designer colors, has custom window coverings, and has been landscaped front and back. New roof installed 4 years ago. Property zoned R2A- could add 2nd unit. Nothing left to do except move in and enjoy!!
I said just about everything I needed to say in the previous posts, so I'll cut this short. Look, I'm glad this flipper appears to be getting serious about pricing, but I'm understandably skeptical about whether this will continue. The sense of bubble-profit-entitlement runs strong with this one.
"Damn it, I paid $423,000 in 2002 and it's my God-given right to earn $475,000 on my investment! Okay, maybe doubling my money is a bit much, but I deserve at least $400,000 on my investment. Hmph, this market sure is taking a while to resume its 20% yearly appreciation. Fine, uh, how about $350,000 profit? Well shit, I'm not going to give the thing away! How is a guy supposed to satiate his greed and soothe his savvy investor's ego with only $350k?! Hmph, nothing has sold this year for over $550,000, so maybe I should take a teeny bit off the asking price. Fine, fine, I'm entitled to $275,000 in bubble gravy, but that's my final offer! Any takers?
Anyone?
Nobody?
Uh, this market's gonna turn around any minute now, right?
This is the bottom, right?
Right?
Oh. Fuck."
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