Wednesday, March 31, 2010

For the Love of Money: FINAL UPDATE

Sold on 03/15/10 for $592,500

After seven months trying to get $729,000 for a self-proclaimed "fixer," this dipshit lost his house to the bank in in November 2009.

Notably, the bank took it back at auction for $603,500. Remember, the house sold for a mere $225,000 in '93, meaning instead of building 17 years of equity this reckless fool racheted up nearly $400,000 in HELOCs and second mortages!

Anyhow, the bank threw it on the MLS in December and finally sold this month for a $10,000 loss, plus about $36,000 in commissions, and however much was spent sprucing it up (not much by the looks of things). There could have been much more than $600,000 in loans against this thing, but without that information it seems like Joe and Jane Taxpayer dodged a bullet on this one. It could have been much worse.


For a small piece of paper it carries a lot of weight,
Oh, that mean, mean, mean, mean, mean green.
Almighty Dollar!
Talkin' bout, talkin' bout - cash!
I know that money is the root of all evil,
Do funny things to some people.
Give me a nickel, brother can you spare a dime?
Money can drive some people out of their minds.

For the love of money.
No good, no good, no good.

For the love of money.
Don't sell ya soul for the money - no, no.

-The O'Jays, For the Love of Money

Address: 5216 E. Vista, 90803
Asking Price: $729,000
Year Built: 1941
Size: 3 beds, 1 baths, 1,243 sq. ft.
$/Sq. Ft.: $586
Purchase price: $225,000
Purchase date: 10/1993
MLS#: P684522
On Redfin: 62 days
Down Payment: $146,000
Monthly Payment: $4,200
Income Requirement: $208,000
Description: This 3 bedroom 1 bath fixer property is in heart of Belmont Park. Walking distance to many restaurants, shops, just minutes from the beach and the marina. Hardwood floors throughout, 1/2 block to Lowell Elementary

LOL: "Listing Price Excludes: Dining room light, entry hall light"


The word "fixer" should never be a descriptor for a house asking $586 per square foot. Not that that nugget of common sense would ever stop delusional Long Beach sellers from their delusional ways.

But don't worry about it, pal, I'm sure there are plenty of doctor/lawyer couples looking to shell out $4,200 a month for the privilege of sharing a bathroom and paying for all of your (obviously substantial) deferred maintenance.

Incredibly, this asking price of $729,000 is a $79,000 increase from the original April demand of $650,000!

Great sales tactic!

Here is where my jaw hit the floor: This (outwardly) cute little house was purchased in 1993 for $225,000, but even if they found a buyer for $729,000 IT STILL WOULDN'T COVER THE LOANS!


If serial refinancing were heroin, before his fatal short-sale overdose this guy was in the "turning-tricks-on-Santa-Monica-Boulevard-and-shooting-up-in-between-his-toes" stage.

The amazing thing is, if he hadn't taken out so much money against the house, a few years from now he would probably own this place free-and-clear.


He would have absolute financial freedom and could retire in this absolutely amazing neighborhood with no house payment. But instead of monetary liberty, our avarice-fueled seller chose a life of unchecked greed, rampant consumerism, and living above his means. The implacable desire for cash money can truly drive people out they damn minds.

There are no other pictures provided, so for the sake of alacrity I'll keep this short. I just thought you'd like to see where your hard-earned tax dollars are going: To myopic, irresponsible turds like this one.


  1. Hah! So that is the natural history of a lot of these overpriced listings- they sit there until the schlep gets foreclosed upon. Now it can move at market price and actually become useful. All of which is why all the foreclosure prevention efforts do nothing to help anyone, just kicking the can down the road and extending the housing bust out a few years.

  2. The neighborhood is of course sweet enough to give you a cavity. The house isn't bad at all, though it of course is gonna take some dollars to get it looking nice. Some pics of the yard might not have hurt, but hey, why use logic?


    $529k seems like a pretty good price for a house with 1250 square feet, and I'm guessing some sort of backyard, in this hood.

    Dang, to have it paid off in that area??? Would be awfully nice El Bee, you're so right!!!!!

    But hey, PSEs don't come cheap! (if you know what I mean, and I bet you do ;->