Friday, March 19, 2010

Arigato: CAPITULATION

Wow. I almost forgot about this dummy. Click here for the entire saga.

This derelict dojo has been on the market since August 2007. And after dicking around for nearly three years with pie-in-the-sky pricing strategies and minuscule, utterly pointless price cuts (nicks, more like), it appears this seller has finally thrown in the towel.

After starting at a certifiably WTF price of $3,250,000, they are now asking a mere $999,000. Dude, that's approaching the land value of the double-lot!

That's nuts.

And now it's a short sale. Good lord. Holding out for the imaginary, unearned bubble riches you so clearly "deserved" didn't work out too well, did it?

The bank must be shitting its pants. If they can't get a short sale going, what the hell are they going to do with it when they foreclose and take it back? Seriously.

This property is so ugly, odd, and, frankly, embarrassing, that the bank knows it will be extremely difficult to sell with anything other than a fire sale price attached to it.

Assuming the bank is actually willing to let it go for a million clams, I think the bank will easily find a buyer. Think about it. At that price, you're basically buying two plots of land in an incredibly prime area...with a huge novelty house thrown in for free.

Garishness notwithstanding, we're talking about $274 per square foot in the Shore. If I had the means I'd seriously consider it.

The only bummer for the new owner is bathing here every morning:

Woof.

If you're curious, here is the new (photoless) listing.

Have a great weekend, y'all.

3 comments:

  1. ElBee
    Thank you for the hilarious and educational site. I will probably never understand California real estate and the mentality of buying homes that are not priced at reality of the income earners in a particular city.

    I think I will keep renting for another year.

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  2. Speaking of capitulation, look who finally got representation: http://www.redfin.com/CA/Long-Beach/1418-E-Florida-St-90802/unit-1/home/7618203. Too bad it was too little, too late--we used to rent in that area and that's a nice complex (even if the surroundings are so-so).

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  3. Jeebus!!! I can't friggin believe it. If I had the cash I'd jump on it since the dirt is worth about 300 a square foot in the 'shore.

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